irreversible

decided to act upon my idea. lesson learned- everytime i didn't do it, and god knows i've came up with some smashing ideas, somebody else did it. so there.
after passing the LEED test i can go and play jeopardy anytime. love what i learned. so much oppotrunities to make your home healthy.
i don't suffer anymore from the notion " oh, he doesn't love me". fuck that shit. i love me and that's ok for now.
learned that i am the only one that i can depend on. that's ok too.
noone strokes my genius. for now. the only thing that motivates me is my vision for the future. which is great.
survived a deathbed this year. made me understand i am mortal.
went through lots of crap just because i allowed it. denial is a powerful noun.

Observation leeds me to frustration.
Confrontation brings alienation.
I, who stand alone but
not lonely at all,
a requiem prepare,
-for a dream this time,
this time- no despair.
...I judge you not...
for fact of matter
and a lack of better,
I , I blind the truth a lot!
Happiness over comfort.
Love propels forward.

overdrive

it was an early day. woke up at 7 am, did my morning rituals and left for a LEED session. it was snowing and my tires are like watermellons. no traction whatsoever. eh well, it was a slow drive and to add to the insult i took the wrong exit and got totally lost. now what? time is flying, i'm already late and panicking, so i stopped at a gas station to get these complicated directions and voila!- i made it. 15 min grace.
i learned some new things at the session but the most important thing was- i felt almost ready to take the test. it's ok, few more days and i'll do it. i am reluctant to go unprepared because i finance my own exam (proud of it) and i can't afford $35o to go down the drain. also, i am in possesion now of the practice test which i'll write tomorrow.
on my way back, i heard on the radio that the liberal party leadership race is coming to an end. namely it's ignatieff vs. dion. rae couln't stand the chance. so be it.
a phonecall from you know who, quick and sour, regarding my taxi services. oh... i almost forgot! that's when i usually get a call.
i know a man who makes me want to kill.